It’s no secret to anyone who knows me well, that Edinburgh is, by an incredibly long stretch, my favourite city in the entire world. It’s also no secret to those of you kind enough to have read my previous blogs, that I harbour an almost obsessive love of all things dark, mysterious and altogether spooky…
The Witchery by the Castle is as moody and magical as the streets upon which it sits. The perfect epitome of its mother city, with her shaded closes, towering medieval castle, and bleak history, it’s the stuff great stories are made of, and the ideal platform on which for someone like me to indulge their penchant for atmospheric delights.
This five star rated boutique Gothic hotel and restaurant first came to my attention sometime during my early childhood. Due to the fact my mother’s side of the family hailed from New Town, Edinburgh, I would, quite often, accompany my grandma on visits to see family relatives who still resided within the city. These excursions played an integral part in my lifelong love affair with Edinburgh, not only because they were my first experience of overnight urban living – the idea that life continued outside of daytime hours was still an entirely new concept to a young girl living in the relative quiet of the Yorkshire Dales – but because it was like gazing at a tangible reflection of all the things I loved in stories.
Castles, cobbles, graveyards, towering medieval architecture worm-holed with snakelike crevices of dangerously thrilling closes littered with the richest tales of history available to humanity… it’s no wonder Edinburgh’s timeworn walkways formed a heart-shaped anchor of inspiration in the foundation of my existence.
A firm favourite activity of these early Edinburgh vacations, would be for my grandma to book herself and I on a ghost tour. Tourists, visitors and residents alike are spoilt for choice with regards to underground jaunts, supernatural circuits and historical walks around the city. However, for my family and I, the best by far was – and still is – The Cadies & Witchery Tours of 84 West Bow. The brain child of Robin Mitchell, playwright extraordinaire and occult enthusiast, The C & W Tours combine their own particular mix of comedic theatre and murderous trivia with which to entertain their guests, and I can honestly say I never laugh so hard, whilst quaking with fear, than I do when I’m with this merry bunch of artists.
Tours are available every night of the year, beginning at 7pm, just below Castlehill – which may seem like a shameless advertisement, however, it happens to be an important link to my tale, as the exact meeting point has been, for as long as I can remember, right outside the entrance to The Witchery.
Frequented by the famous, The Witchery by the Castle has long held an allure of unattainability, or, at least it did at one time to wide-eyed, wondrous, childhood me as my grandma and I joined the ghost tour congregation, blanketed by descending night, peering with interested awe into the lowdown windows of the restaurant lacing the cobbles of The Royal Mile. As stated, The Witchery is both restaurant and hotel, with suites available from around £345 per night.
It was this last fact that, for a long time, kept the idea of staying at The Witchery firmly locked away in my mind’s, ‘Most Naughty and Decadent Life Goals’ closet. However, years later, sometime during my mid-twenties, I had the idea of taking my grandma on a trip around our old Edinburgh haunts and spending an evening not merely gazing through The Witchery’s windows, but actually dining on the other side of them instead. It was her seventieth birthday present from me to her, and I can’t tell you how it felt to finally share in that moment of euphoric nostalgia, creating a minute-by-minute memory of something that meant so much in equal measures to us both.
It wasn’t until just under a decade later, that the irresistible urge to experience The Witchery in its entirety finally overcame me. As stated in an earlier post, written in celebration of my most-loved season, I always pick somewhere special to stay for Halloween. Due to the fact, I’d also recently completed my first self-published novel, I couldn’t think of a better time than this to treat myself to a Most Naughty and Decadent Life Goal which, as you’ve already guessed, was an evening dining and sleeping at The Witchery.
When it came to picking a room, I was initially distressed by the fact I couldn’t sleep in every single one of them. The Witchery has nine rooms, each one oozing with sumptuous upholstery, shadowy corners and lavish curios. The colour scheme for each is an unapologetic nod to Gothic Romanticism, with a bit of The Tudors mixed in for good measure. Golds, reds, greens and purples dominate the pallets of these lovingly crafted suites, so you can imagine how torn I was at having to choose one over the other.
Though, being a writer, I was tempted to select The Library room, with its book-lined walls and secret staircase, the story-lover overcame the story-teller in me and I opted – quite willingly – for The Old Rectory. With a theatrical ambience of shameless religious overtones, draped in crimson and garnished with gold, I couldn’t resist the thought of experiencing this suite first-hand. So, it was with great excitement and long-awaited joy that I booked myself in for a night at my childhood dream hotel.
Founded in 1979 by renowned hotelier, James Thomson, The Witchery by the Castle was originally created in an effort to save Boswell’s Court, the sixteenth-century close, and site, upon which the hotel’s buildings stand. Forty years later, The Witchery has gained an almost cult-like following of clientele due to its unique status and magnetic allure. Skimming through the online guestbook, you’ll notice such names as Roger Taylor, Brian Ferry, John Cleese, Emma Thompson and (my ultimate favourite) The Darkness immortalised amongst its pages and its no wonder its spellbinding sophistication draws such creative infamy to its door.
The Witchery contains two main eateries… the baroque-themed candlelit dining room – simply named, ‘The Witchery’ – I visited with my grandma over a decade ago, and The Secret Garden restaurant, opened in 1990 and built on a forgotten schoolyard. Upon checking in on Halloween, 2016, I was immediately aware of the latter as, beneath the dark wooden reception desk – known as ‘the pulpit’ – which forms a picturesque balcony above a descending spiral staircase, a botanical delight of fairy tale magic beckoned to me from the room below. I was, of course, looking at The Secret Garden. Garlands of flowers hang from various positions of beauty, illuminated by a glass roof skylight that gives the restaurant an airy glow compared to the shadowy recesses of its glinting – but equally dazzling – sister restaurant. Under a painted ceiling, complemented by autumn scenery visible through French windows stretching to the left, The Secret Garden is certainly one charming sight to behold, and a striking testament to The Witchery’s distinctive reputation.
After checking in, we were shown to our suite which, as stated, was The Old Rectory apartment. Accessed from outside, in a tall turret, via a steep, spiral, stone staircase, this particular apartment is located a couple of floors up and directly overlooks The Royal Mile. Our male guide seemed happily impressed – and perhaps slightly amused – by my initial surprise over the size of the room, yet, after very kindly helping me with my bags, he handed over the key and wished me a pleasant stay.
Nothing could’ve prepared me for the heart-hugging wonder of what I saw before me as I entered the Old Rectory. Strains of nostalgia-inducing bagpipes drifted through the open windows as classic music played from a radio near the fireplace. Consisting of two main rooms (not including the bathroom), the suite contains a four-poster bed, day bed, sofa, armchair, dressing table, dining table, mini fridge, television and ironing board (with iron) – all the key amenities for a fabulous night in. Complimentary champagne cools in ice in a silver ornate bowl beside The Witchery’s own branded chocolate selection, with civilised tea and coffee making facilities, complete with cups and saucers sitting upon the dining table cloth.
Bookcases adorned with gilded pinnacles bookmark each side of the fireplace against deep red walls, behind the clerically themed four-poster bed which, I read, is genuinely fashioned from old pulpits. Beams of dim light creep from beneath lampshades, casting little glows of eerie brightness across various sections of each room, as a mannequin dressed in tartan and bearskin hat stands guard by the furthermost window.
As stated many times already, cardinal red is the overarching hue, spreading across each crevice of this gorgeously Gothic apartment, with swirls of flaming gold piercing its saintly claret canvas in a halo of halcyon. Religious paraphernalia in plate, trinket box, goblet and statue form grace numerous surfaces, while, from the day bed, a comfortable reclining station crouches opposite a closeted television and drink-making centre.
The bathroom we’ll come to later, but first, it was time to ready myself for an evening’s dining in. Finding it difficult to prise myself away from the window-side settee, as, gazing down at the hustle and bustle of Castlehill, I felt an irresistible longing to relive my Edinburgh memories through people-watching form, I eventually dressed and trotted back down the sixteenth-century staircase and alighted upon the doorstep of The Witchery restaurant.
I’d decided to go down the traditional route and choose the same – and original – restaurant I’d visited with my grandma all those years ago. Satisfied I’d at least had a good gander at The Secret Garden, I felt no qualms in reverting back to that which I knew best. The entrance to The Witchery is located through an equidistant archway, between the reception desk and my turreted doorway. Those simply dining out for the evening from separate locations, will find access to The Witchery’s main courtyard beneath the red, gold and blue court of arms that hangs above the aged corridor to Boswell’s Court.
There’s a touch of Game of Thrones to the aroma of The Witchery’s moody decor. Reeking of medieval banquet rooms with discs of hammered gold gracing the ornate, wood panelled walls that flicker enigmatically in the somewhat ghostly light shimmering from a host of candlelit tables, this restaurant is as supernaturally compelling as its notoriety suggests. In true Witchery style, a wave of deep red colours the cushioned benches lining each wall of the low-ceilinged chamber, and intricate carvings stare out at you from hinged arm rests, and ornamental roof panels.
Food at The Witchery ranges from around £7.50 – £96.00, though a lunchtime offering of two courses for £22 is available from 12:30 noon – 4:30pm. Though it does provide a small selection of vegetarian starters and mains, its meat and fish dishes are widely considered to be primary specialities. Though my diet has since become predominantly meat free, back then, I decided to treat myself to a starter of steak tartare, seasoned with raw prime Scotch Borders beef with raw quail egg, and a main of roast fillet of Scrabster cod, with crushed butternut squash and grilled wild leek. As for The Witchery’s wine list, I feel confident in saying it’s particularly extensive, though, being ignorant of the merits of red wine (a glass of which I had and can’t, for the life of me, remember the name of!), all I can tell you is that it was nice and aptly matched the decor of my surroundings. The restaurant’s table service was, of course, impeccable and I felt duly attended to throughout the experience until it was time to retire to my lodgings and take full advantage of The Old Rectory’s free-standing bath.
I have a thing about bathrooms. The more intriguing and ominously vintage they are, the more interested I am in spending time with them. For this reason, the bathroom of The Old Rectory did not fail to disappoint. Located behind a secret door (which, during my stay, kept spookily opening of its own accord) within the panels of the day bed area, it contains two sinks with ornate gold mirrors, library-themed wallpaper, curious portraits, an en-suite toilet plus shower – secreted behind yet another hidden door – and, more importantly, a two-person silver bath in the centre of the room.
Making full use of my complimentary dressing gown and slippers, I let the water run, whilst enjoying a relaxing moment or two, sitting in an armchair beside the open window and listening to those same street sounds that had so excited me as a child visiting Edinburgh for the first time almost twenty five years ago. Gazing up at the ceiling, with its swirls of painted print stretching over every surface, I happily drank a glass or two of champagne and raised a glass to my grandma who, though is thankfully still with us, could not be there with me.
I have to admit, my night was a little restless. This was not due to any discomfort – in fact, the bed was one of the most luxurious I’d ever slept it – but because I found it difficult to douse the adrenaline I felt at having finally stayed beneath the roof of an establishment I’d long wished to frequent. Loath to shut my eyes for fear of missing out on each sacred minute of splendour, I instead lay there listening to the city around me, wondering at the source of a curious soft banging that seemed to emanate from somewhere behind the fireplace. Convinced it was the spirit of some tormented soul entrapped within the aged brickwork as a result of sixteenth-century foul play, I mentally concocted story after story as I snuggled between the copious red cushions, smiling all the while at how perfect the evening had been.
When morning came, I was admittedly bleary-eyed and sleepy, but the welcome sight of a gentleman quietly slipping a breakfast hamper through my door and tiptoeing respectfully away before I could even thank him, quickly replenished my energy levels. Upon opening it, I discovered an abundance of hot coffee, tea, milk, croissants, jams, cheese, continental meats, yoghurts, cereals, fruit and fresh juice – everything I needed and more for a luxuriant morning feast. The dining table, which had, so far, been used as a drinks station, now came into its own and provided a deliciously comfortable platform upon which to enjoy a relaxing breakfast, unobserved by fellow guests.
I had absolutely no desire to leave The Witchery when it finally came close to checking-out time, and it was with huge sadness I packed my belongings and dragged myself down the staircase to hand my key in at reception. Not only had this beautiful backdrop transported me to a world that set my soul alight, but the attention and impeccable manners of the hotel’s staff made me feel a respected and integral part of the whole Witchery experience. It’s been a couple of years now since my last visit and already I can feel its bewitching pull, invoking me to pick up where I left off, and languish in the parlour of its magical chambers once more. Who knows, perhaps the studious alcoves of The Library might tempt me to return, or the regal regiments of The Armoury, with its window-lined walkway could provide inspiration for my next piece of descriptive scribble. Whatever the future outcome, I am not yet done with The Witchery and The Witchery is certainly not yet done with me – a state of existence I’m delighted to indulge, in the hope we’ll meet and enjoy each other again, very soon.
THE WITCHERY BY THE CASTLE
STAR RATING *****
PRICES (May vary – please visit website for updated offers.)
From £345 per night (including breakfast, champagne, cookies, mineral water, newspaper and turn down service)
FOOD
Starters: £7.50-£16.50
Mains: £16.00-£96.00 (with sharing options)
Desserts: £7.00-£13.50
The Lunch Menu (12:30 noon – 4:30pm)
Two Courses: £22.00 per person
Witchery Afternoon Tea (Monday – Friday, from 3pm until 4:30pm): £30 per person
Witchery Champagne Afternoon Tea (Monday – Friday, from 3pm until 4:30pm): £40 per person
Witchery Rosé Champagne Afternoon Tea (Monday – Friday, from 3pm until 4:30pm): £47 per person
A LIGHT THROUGH YONDER WINDOW 